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*headdesk*
Oct. 15th, 2014 07:20 pmDear housemate.
Telling the other members of the house that a different housemate offended you and therefore you're not going to clean up after dinner? Not good, not useful, not necessary.
One, no one else can even figure out what she could have said that would be offensive, aside from maybe the fact that she judged the people who came in to her coffee shop and treated her like an idiot while revealing their own ignorance? Especially when you say that you don't consider anything an offensive topic, and want to discuss and be able to laugh at/make jokes about anything, you are not exactly signalling to anyone that they might be approaching a sensitive subject for you.
Two, if someone has offended you, you don't go to other people, tell them that she said something that offended you, and refuse to be direct with her. That was written in the house rules: no triangling. If you have an issue, you go to the person about it first, and if that doesn't work, then you can ask for a neutral party. We have people assigned to the house just for those kinds of issues.
Three, even if someone did offend you, that does not mean that you get out of doing a basic chore. It's already been established that whoever makes dinner clears up the dinner dishes afterwards. Nothing she said would have changed the fact that you made dinner and you are responsible for clearing up the cooking dishes you made. You can't even get upset about doing the dinner dishes by yourself because you were the one who refused a partner to make dinner with.
Ugh. This is getting to be a pattern with him. A few weeks ago he pulled this in relation to me, waiting until after we had decided as a house to do a basic care and feeding Q&A. Then he stormed down to the kitchen, told the two people who were cleaning up after that meal that they should "Tell Margaret that he would not be filling out that form," and stormed back up to his room. All without so much as communicating with me, or bothering to remember that someone else had actually asked for us to do that form, I'd just given the initial questions.
*headdesks* There are times it is very obvious that this guy is the youngest in the house, and has never lived with anyone outside of his immediate family before.
Telling the other members of the house that a different housemate offended you and therefore you're not going to clean up after dinner? Not good, not useful, not necessary.
One, no one else can even figure out what she could have said that would be offensive, aside from maybe the fact that she judged the people who came in to her coffee shop and treated her like an idiot while revealing their own ignorance? Especially when you say that you don't consider anything an offensive topic, and want to discuss and be able to laugh at/make jokes about anything, you are not exactly signalling to anyone that they might be approaching a sensitive subject for you.
Two, if someone has offended you, you don't go to other people, tell them that she said something that offended you, and refuse to be direct with her. That was written in the house rules: no triangling. If you have an issue, you go to the person about it first, and if that doesn't work, then you can ask for a neutral party. We have people assigned to the house just for those kinds of issues.
Three, even if someone did offend you, that does not mean that you get out of doing a basic chore. It's already been established that whoever makes dinner clears up the dinner dishes afterwards. Nothing she said would have changed the fact that you made dinner and you are responsible for clearing up the cooking dishes you made. You can't even get upset about doing the dinner dishes by yourself because you were the one who refused a partner to make dinner with.
Ugh. This is getting to be a pattern with him. A few weeks ago he pulled this in relation to me, waiting until after we had decided as a house to do a basic care and feeding Q&A. Then he stormed down to the kitchen, told the two people who were cleaning up after that meal that they should "Tell Margaret that he would not be filling out that form," and stormed back up to his room. All without so much as communicating with me, or bothering to remember that someone else had actually asked for us to do that form, I'd just given the initial questions.
*headdesks* There are times it is very obvious that this guy is the youngest in the house, and has never lived with anyone outside of his immediate family before.