ficpost, What Might Have Been 3/?
Jul. 11th, 2006 01:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mari4212I'm continuing my Doctor Who AU. Previous parts are here: http://mari4212.livejournal.com/85585.html for part one, and here: http://mari4212.livejournal.com/88743.html for part two.
Fandom Doctor Who
Title What Might Have Been, chapter three
Characters: Rose, Reinette, Tenth Doctor
Timeline Post TGitF, but it branches off from there and ignores the rest of the season.
Disclaimer Doctor Who and all associated characters belong to RTD and the BBC, not me.
She’d done a lot with the Doctor. Faced the Nestene Consciousness, nearly been possessed by the Gelth, actually been possessed by Cassandra, had dozens of people try to kill her, and yet this was the most difficult task she’d ever been set. Making peace with Reinette.
Rose shuddered. It had been hard enough watching the Doctor go to save her in the first place, and harder still when he’d returned hand in hand with the woman. To make it worse, Rose couldn’t even indulge herself by hating the woman! She was bright and curious and brave, and she took well to the TARDIS and the reality of being one of the Doctor’s companions. Actually, if Rose was honest with herself, Reinette had adapted better than Rose herself had.
It had been easier in the first few days. Rose had been able to focus on getting Reinette into appropriate clothes for traveling through space and time, and teaching her the basic rules for surviving any of the Doctor’s little adventures. Wear running shoes at all times, for example, and don’t let the Doctor insult your captors when the dictator’s goons have just arrested you.
But once the transition period was over and Reinette had regained her confidence, Rose had had to watch her start flirting with the Doctor again. And it had hurt, watching the Doctor pull his puppy-dog eyes on another woman, seeing all that energy and passion focused on someone other than herself. Reinette at least seemed to be aware of Rose’s feelings and saved the majority of her flirtations for when Rose didn’t have to be in the room, but the Doctor was just oblivious.
It hurt to not be the one the Doctor automatically looked for when one of their adventures inevitably turned nasty. No matter how often Rose reminded herself that it was a sign that the Doctor trusted her to be able to take care of herself, or how it made sense that Reinette would get the extra focus because she wasn’t used to the dangers. Some part of her still cried out, remembering how the old Doctor had looked at her as if she was the only person in the room, or the adventures she’d had with this Doctor, and how they’d laughed and talked and she’d still felt special, the best, the one the Doctor had chosen to take with him despite everything.
She dealt with it in the only way she knew how. She dove headfirst into their adventures, sublimating her hurt and frustration into her desire to understand the new cultures they visited. The last few planets, she’d noticed it when something was wrong even before the Doctor had. And when they were back in the TARDIS, she didn’t hang around in the console room as much as she used to. She wandered for hours, exploring parts of the TARDIS that she’d never seen before. Sometimes she thought that the TARDIS knew how she was feeling, and deliberately opened new passages and rooms so that she could walk herself until she was tired enough to forget her hurt pride and bruised feelings. She was not going to let herself get mopey about it. So what if the Doctor wasn’t actually in love with her, the way she was with him? He loved her, she knew. And it wasn’t as if she didn’t like Reinette. It was just selfish and childish, to get comfortable with what used to be and whine when things changed.
So why couldn’t she stop herself from wishing for something more?
Fandom Doctor Who
Title What Might Have Been, chapter three
Characters: Rose, Reinette, Tenth Doctor
Timeline Post TGitF, but it branches off from there and ignores the rest of the season.
Disclaimer Doctor Who and all associated characters belong to RTD and the BBC, not me.
She’d done a lot with the Doctor. Faced the Nestene Consciousness, nearly been possessed by the Gelth, actually been possessed by Cassandra, had dozens of people try to kill her, and yet this was the most difficult task she’d ever been set. Making peace with Reinette.
Rose shuddered. It had been hard enough watching the Doctor go to save her in the first place, and harder still when he’d returned hand in hand with the woman. To make it worse, Rose couldn’t even indulge herself by hating the woman! She was bright and curious and brave, and she took well to the TARDIS and the reality of being one of the Doctor’s companions. Actually, if Rose was honest with herself, Reinette had adapted better than Rose herself had.
It had been easier in the first few days. Rose had been able to focus on getting Reinette into appropriate clothes for traveling through space and time, and teaching her the basic rules for surviving any of the Doctor’s little adventures. Wear running shoes at all times, for example, and don’t let the Doctor insult your captors when the dictator’s goons have just arrested you.
But once the transition period was over and Reinette had regained her confidence, Rose had had to watch her start flirting with the Doctor again. And it had hurt, watching the Doctor pull his puppy-dog eyes on another woman, seeing all that energy and passion focused on someone other than herself. Reinette at least seemed to be aware of Rose’s feelings and saved the majority of her flirtations for when Rose didn’t have to be in the room, but the Doctor was just oblivious.
It hurt to not be the one the Doctor automatically looked for when one of their adventures inevitably turned nasty. No matter how often Rose reminded herself that it was a sign that the Doctor trusted her to be able to take care of herself, or how it made sense that Reinette would get the extra focus because she wasn’t used to the dangers. Some part of her still cried out, remembering how the old Doctor had looked at her as if she was the only person in the room, or the adventures she’d had with this Doctor, and how they’d laughed and talked and she’d still felt special, the best, the one the Doctor had chosen to take with him despite everything.
She dealt with it in the only way she knew how. She dove headfirst into their adventures, sublimating her hurt and frustration into her desire to understand the new cultures they visited. The last few planets, she’d noticed it when something was wrong even before the Doctor had. And when they were back in the TARDIS, she didn’t hang around in the console room as much as she used to. She wandered for hours, exploring parts of the TARDIS that she’d never seen before. Sometimes she thought that the TARDIS knew how she was feeling, and deliberately opened new passages and rooms so that she could walk herself until she was tired enough to forget her hurt pride and bruised feelings. She was not going to let herself get mopey about it. So what if the Doctor wasn’t actually in love with her, the way she was with him? He loved her, she knew. And it wasn’t as if she didn’t like Reinette. It was just selfish and childish, to get comfortable with what used to be and whine when things changed.
So why couldn’t she stop herself from wishing for something more?
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no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 05:30 pm (UTC)Why does all your stuff get even better with the re-reading? I love it, I love it, I love it! Heartbreaking, yes, but still with a little nugget of happy hope.
Thank you, so much, for this. :D
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 06:33 pm (UTC)*hugs tightly* I'm working slowly but surely on the next bit, so hopefully you'll have that soon.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 07:11 pm (UTC)I like GitF, but your story makes me miss Nine more than ever.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 07:43 pm (UTC)*surreptitiously points downwards to the Ninth Doctor fic a few posts earlier*
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 07:54 pm (UTC)I just read it now, though. I love your writing! It makes me sad that you leave horrible (sort of) cliff-hangers and I have to wait to see what happens next. Or it's possible I just hate WIPs in regards to Doctor Who and anything Stargate, hence my reasoning in staying far away from incomplete works in those 'verses :x
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 08:04 pm (UTC)Luckily, I think the only part of the Rodney backstory that someone might not understand just from watching Stargate is that he had a sister named Jeanie.
I'm figuring about one more chapter or so for the Stargate crossover, but it will be on Atlantis.
As for this WIP, I promise that if I do loose interest, I'll at least wrap up loose ends and come to some sort of conclusion, rather than leave it dangling.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-11 08:04 pm (UTC)